We are taught to forgive those who have wronged us but forgiveness can be hard especially when forgiving is done in the wrong context.
Forgiving can be difficult sometimes as it feels that the person who has hurt you is getting away with it. You may feel weak and powerless- A victim. When you truly forgive you free yourself to move forward and empower yourself.
When we think of forgiving it is something we do for another. Forgiveness is normally seen in this type of scenario.
- Someone upsets you.
- The person who upset you apologises.
- You then forgive the person who upset you.
What if there is no chance of resolution or an apology? Maybe you cannot talk to them anymore?
Forgiveness is not for a person who may have hurt you. Forgiveness is for you!
Forgiving is to free yourself of all anguish, hate, turmoil and upset that you may feel or experience. Release and free yourself of all the negativity a situation has created.
There is an expression “forgiven but not forgotten”. While this is a great starting point we can do far more.
Often in my life I have encountered the scenario where no matter how much I grow, develop and change some people still see me how I used to be. They responded to behaviour they expected from me rather than how I actually behaved.
By not forgetting are we possibly limiting the other person’s ability/ease to grow and change?
Maybe we should forgive and forget?
If we are living in the present, every situation will be assessed in that moment. Rather than judging a situation from past deeds and previous experiences, we should be fully present in the moment, in a state of awareness and engaging all our senses.
I say forgive and forget!
Forgiveness for yourself! Forgetting for others!
Mark- The Alchemist’s Journey